Thursday, August 16, 2007

22 Great Rules to Live By.......

01. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty muchleave me the hell alone.

02. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan beltand leaky tire.

03. Its always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

04. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

05. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

06. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

07. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

08 Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes

09. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably a wise investment.

12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.

14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a darkside, and it holds the universe together.

18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips
are moving.

20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

3 Comments:

Blogger Qatar Cat said...

Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Walk all over me: I like it!

;-)

August 20, 2007 9:47 AM  
Blogger ammaro.com said...

thats hilarious! good stuff to abide by ;)

September 13, 2007 6:10 AM  
Blogger Cerebralwaste said...

QC & Ammaro

Thanks for stopping by! You both are always welcome here!

ciao!
cw

September 20, 2007 9:43 AM  

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