Friday, June 29, 2007

Thankfully the attack in London today was foiled. I truly hope MI5 finds, locates and eliminates those that planned this most recent act of terrorism.

The Brits dodged a bullet today. No question about it. Still the pessimist in me is still waiting for the other shoe to drop here in the US. I am still surprised that we have not seen this kind of stuff happening on our streets and I am ever thankful it hasn't. It is a clear testament to the FBI, CIA and NSA that we haven't had an attack on US soil since 9/11. We know the terrorist have tried, and still are trying. To keep this record our security services have to be perfect 100% of the time. Something that is impossible to do.

The best advice is don't live in fear but do keep your eyes and ears open. If something looks or feels out of place follow your gut instinct. Better to be safe than sorry.


Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Fruit may be frost damaged

Australian citrus farmers fear damage after coldest June day ever...

LOCAL citrus producers have their fingers crossed waiting to see if their fruit suffered frost damage after the area experienced its coldest June day ever last week. Consecutive days of thick and heavy frosts, and temperatures dropping to as low as four degrees, may have taken their toll.

Riverina Citrus executive officer Peter Morrish said if fruit had been damaged it could take weeks to see, but fruit with a high internal sugar content should be unscathed. “It’s hard to tell at the moment if fruit has been damaged because it takes a while for the damage to be seen in the fruit,” Mr Morrish said. Griffith and District Citrus Growers Association president Frank Battistel said low temperatures highlighted the importance of winter irrigation to citrus growers. “The watering began on Sunday but the extreme frosts were on Friday and Saturday,” Mr Battistel said. “If any damage has occurred, and we don’t know if it has yet, it will most likely have occurred then.”

Monday, June 18, 2007

Brain Dead and Proud of It!!!!!

I've been trying to find something worth posting, either a funny or serious bit of news or something my warped brain conjures up and NOTHING is happening on either front. So I haven't forgotten the lack of a post for the past 10 days or so but as I said nothing is "floating my boat" right now. Even my other blog is somewhat dry as well. This happens now and then. Don't know why but it does. Sooner or later that "spark" will come back and CerebralWaste will be firing on all synapses again.

So... If anyone reading this has something they want to post, email me and I will post it! As long as it isn't pornoesque for all those porno perverts out there, I would say there is a 99.9999% chance I will post it.


Thursday, June 07, 2007

An Immigrant Tail
A Somali refugee arrives in Minneapolis, qat in hand, as a new immigrant to the United States.

He is in complete awe of the tall buildings he sees and slightly bemused about the frigid weather. It is mid MAY after all and the temps are in the mid 60's F.

With wide eyes and great pleasure he stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you Mr. American for letting me in this country, giving me housing, food stamps, free medical care, and free education! Now I can bring my whole family here as well" He pauses for a second and shouts in broken English, "AMERICA IS WONDEFUL COUNTRY!!! (The Somali passed on the FREE ENGLISH as SECOND LANGUAGE classes offered at the local Community College)

The passerby, slightly bemused says, "You are mistaken, I am Mexican. Senor."

The Somali refugee immigrant stumbles walking on the smooth Minneapolis sidewalks, unaccustomed to walking on anything other than rough land mined filled dirt roads, meanders on and encounters another passerby. "Thank you for having such beautiful country here in America !" he exclaims.

The person says back to him in broken English, "I not American, I Vietnamese."

The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand, generously offers the man some of his coveted qat and says, "Thank you for the wonderful America!"That person puts up his hand and says, "I am from Brazil, I am not American!"

At this point the Somali refugee immigrant catches a glimpse of the single most American symbol he knows and his eyes have ever seen. No, it isn't the American Flag, it is the Golden Arches of McDonalds. He hurriedly crosses the street, ignoring the cross walk designed for pedestrian use and rushes in, eyes fully ablaze in wonderment. He rushes to the front of the line pushing people aside. He gleefully orders a coffee and a BigMac and exclaims to the cashier how much he loves America.

The cashier, somewhat puzzled at the Somali's strange behavior quips. "I do not like America, I am only here working for money to send home to my village in Guatemala."

Unfettered by the cashiers remark, the Somali grabs a seat and inhaled his BigMac and swilled his coffee and left McDonalds chewing some more qat. Seemingly ignoring the HELPWANTED sign in the window of McDonalds and the one on the counter and on the tray liner.

About a half a block down the street, he spots a nice looking lady and he rushes up to her and gleefully asks, "Are you American?" She says, "No! I am from Africa !"

Somewhat befuddled and puzzled by all the NON AMERICANS he has encountered since arriving in Minneapolis, he scratches his head and gums the qat in his mouth like a cow chewing her cud.

He then asks her, "Where are all the Americans?" The African lady checks her watch and puts one hand on his shoulder and says..."Probably at work..."

America is truly a wonderful country!

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

THE FRENCH ARE PUSSIES! Well we all know that anyway. Read on for more...

Monday, 04 June 2007
SOMALI pirates hijacked a small Danish-flag general cargo ship last Saturday some 114 miles off the coast and sailed it towards Hobbio, north of Mogadishu, where there is now a small fleet of hijacked vessels. According to reports a French warship arrived on the scene as the Danica White entered Somali waters but refused requests from the ship's manager, H Folmer, to intervene within territorial waters.

The 1,616 dwt ship was on passage from Sharjah to Mombasa with five crew on board. There are also three fishing vessels being held at Hobbio. It is understood negotiations for their release are underway. There are unconfirmed rumours that a crew member from one of the fishing vessels may have been killed.

So here was a perfect chance to put a serious dent into the PIRATES that have been lurking in these waters and the FRENCH, with a WARSHIP no less, REFUSE to help. How in the world can the FRENCH live with themselves knowing they possibly have allowed the crew to be sent to their deaths. Does anyone have a semi rational idea why the FRENCH refused to lend aid in a obvious time of need? I don't care one bit about the "territorial waters" arguement and possibly violating it. Hello the FRENCH are in a WARSHIP. Then again perhaps the FRENCH* definition of a Warship is 3 French Men in a row boat, one cheap hooker with a case of wine and a brick of cheese and only one condom. Only possible explination I can think of at this time. Anyone have any better ideas?

I hope the DANSIH open a big ole can of European "whoop ass" and help put an end to this shit once and for all. The US Navy has opened fire on these Pirates more than once and will continue to do so if given the chance. What is needed is complete decimation of the Pirates and the people who give them safe harbor.

Meanwhile the FRENCH are pussies. But we already know that...


*The French Embassy is Washington refused to comment when I called them concerning what is a French Warship.......... CW

Monday, June 04, 2007

The Best Living Will I've Seen

I, CerebralWaste , being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers / doctors interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:

Beer (more!)

Mexican food
French fries

ice cream
cup of tea
Beer (MORE!)

It should then be presumed that I won't ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, let the "fat lady sing". . . and call it a day!