Thursday, March 02, 2006

A Lesson about who reads Newspapers
1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country.
3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are very good at crossword puzzles.
4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don't really understand The New York Times. They do, however, like their statistics shown in pie charts.
5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn't mind running the country -- if they could find the time -- and if they didn't have to leave Southern California to do it.
6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country and did a far superior job of it, thank you very much.
7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren't too sure who's running the country and don't really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.
8. The New York Post is read by people who don't care who's running the country as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.
9. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another country but need the baseball scores.
10. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't sure there is a country .. or that anyone is running it; but if so, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority feminist atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal aliens from any other country or galaxy - provided, of course, that they are not Republicans.
11. The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at the grocery store.

And for the record I read the Wall Street Journal and have been known to write a column or two here and there for a certian unnamed paper!! Thanks to THE COLONEL for tossing this nugget my way!


Blogger Haitham Salman said...

I read Times
where would this place me?

Abu Hesham

March 03, 2006 1:14 AM  
Blogger Cerebralwaste said...

Abu Hesham

Thanks for stopping by this humble little blog!

Your answer all depends on what TIMES you are reading. NY, LA, London Financial?

March 03, 2006 3:11 AM  
Blogger Cerebralwaste said...

Or was that the Alaska Times?

March 03, 2006 3:20 AM  
Anonymous the Colonel said...

True soldiers read The Stars & Stripes newspaper!

March 03, 2006 9:54 AM  
Blogger Ingrid said...

Ha, CW...I so wished I'd run the country (I do read the Wall Street Journal) and even though I do not agree with a third to half of it, it is good to know what Libertarians/certain conservatives/ think politically and about the environment etc. Also, I do feel that the WSJ at least brings up news/indepth coverage that other news papers take over at a later time. They have fascinating background articles and after all is said and done, it makes for a good shredded paper adage to my compost!
see you!

March 04, 2006 10:58 AM  
Blogger Cerebralwaste said...


But does the WSJ use SOY BASED inks??!!

March 04, 2006 3:16 PM  
Blogger SillyBahrainiGirl said...

hehe .. what about those who read the GDN online??

March 05, 2006 5:20 AM  
Blogger Cerebralwaste said...


GDN readers (and writers!) are of course the best, most highly educated, fair and balanced people on the planet... bar none! They walk the walk and talk the talk and most importantly write the words that need to be written either as letters to the editor or as columnists and staff writers!

Does that answer your question!?

March 05, 2006 6:26 AM  
Blogger SillyBahrainiGirl said...

I am humbled

March 05, 2006 5:07 PM  

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